Thread: Hello everyone
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Unread 08-06-2012, 04:02 PM   #1
Tryntryagain
Senior Member
 
Posts: 3,249
Default Hello everyone

Hello all. I just would like to say hello and introduce myself. I'm 46 and have been alcoholic since my early teens. I have had multiple "goes" at sobriety, countless dry outs and rehabs, usually stuttering through some sort of sobriety. I have held lots of responsible jobs that have meant alot of public speaking. Do you know i have never stood on a platform to speak and been sober? Nobody has ever thought i had been drinking. How often i wish i had been "caught". Here i am again. Today is my first day without a drink, and i all know you all know how i am feeling right now. It never ceases to amaze me that when i reach new lows they are always lower than the previous time, and yet each time i think, it can't get any worse. My keyboard is wet with sweat pouring out of me, and have decided that i do not wish to continue this existence if i am accompanied by alcohol anymore. I hate the stuff, and it LOVES trying to kill me. Having run many support groups over the years i can't say that i don;t know the answers. I mean how is it that i have manage to support people through addiction/dependency and yet i don't seem to be able to help myself? It is quite ridiculous and it makes me believe awful things about myself. If i have been able to provide strength to others, why can i not direct that strength to myself? It's bizzare and really disturbing for me. Anyhow, i know you have all heard it before so "Hello friends". Be peaceful, be healthy and be strong". Loveness to all. x
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